And before I knew it, I had hit ‘Send’


And before I knew it, I had hit ‘Send’!

 I waited anxiously for his reply but I know this is mad if he saw it. The picture was the only souvenir of the date we had in our dreamy space. What we went through wasn’t something I could forget or neither for him.

Lying on bed with his fond memories, I wished he were here besides me. Flipping through pages of my journal, I recalled those days were we had endless chatting from nothing to anything. Nevertheless, this was painful when he was far apart and nothing seems to work. Although I wanted to convince him that this won’t work out which he already said before. But I couldn’t accept it. I tried convincing him alas, all went in anguish. The way we build our dreams in future doesn’t hit any reality. But each time I craved for another day with him.

The music was resonating behind the door. It was Morning raga, ‘Radio Mirchi’ playing our love song but it was astonishing cause it’s been years that song released but how suddenly it has to play when I’m missing him.

Arnav came banging at my door.

“Dheedi”, your favorite song playing, laughs out that evil grin. He was enjoying my grief but I couldn’t stand it any longer. It’s annoyingly weird when young siblings could sense something wrong and they go beyond their margins  to find out mischievously.

“Leave me alone, Arnavvv”!

Mr and Mrs. Sharma never agreed to Ria relation of his. They didn’t want their daughter to pursue some young love which is illusion.  They wanted her to pursue their dreams of becoming a well-known doctor. Whenever she brought him home, Sharma’s would offend his background and that was more excruciating.

Ria stood at the balcony staring at the still air, drowned with thousand thoughts like her, may be younger yet joyful. She remembered each moment with him. Particularly when he took her hand, placed it at his chest, and asked her to feel his heart. And the times he sang a song and they danced all night with a full moon watching them in love and harmony.

As I walked to the door, I saw myself on the mirror. I stood there staring at me. Wasn’t it exact spot when I saw myself looking in his eyes, caressing his touch against my skin and he was holding me tight. His feeble voice whispering my name mesmerizing those heartfelt words that made me hung in air that echoed loudly in my heart. For all once, I felt my life was so happy. Bashfully, the happy blushing moments I saw once in my face washed over with tears of heaving pain. As I turn back, I know it’s useless for he is with another girl fulfilling his desires of being needed.

I abruptly ran to the bed for I know all was over. Tears were rolling down my cheeks. I couldn’t control the missing place of him in my life. Nothing can replace the memories I felt as it made me yearn for his care and affection. I really wanted to fight the urge of his love.

Oh God, help me to survive this ache.

********************

My phone was blinking with a familiar name.

Dear Gautam,

The very first time we met, I didn’t know we would be friends and lovers for once. I tried very hard to forget you and move on as we agreed. I made an effort to burn your letters and delete all those pictures but I fail to do was tear down your memories with me that’s stored in my heart forever. May be the letters and pictures were a sign of our love but these reminiscences I can’t hold it any more in me.

 I thought of conceding my life to the above one, for I can’t imagine a life without you in my future. I wish you could hear my heart once again and never leave me alone in this torment.1014381_495792267157576_547233601_n

I couldn’t throw this picture of us engraved in colours… Farel send it to me yesterday…

Gautam, I love you and I miss you lotss…Waiting for you to be mine and only mine…

 Yours only Ria

Gautam didn’t know how to react to her. For he didn’t want to disclose the fact that he is dying. His heart was aching with her memoirs and his each breathes counting. He wanted to tell her all that she meant to him. His heart didn’t want to see her hurt. Already it was too much for him with heavy dose of medicines and chemo… The cancer had spread to his brain and Doctors had lost hope in him, while they earnestly believe in some miracles to happen, alas there is No hope…

Dear Ria…

I love you and miss you every second of my life…

But I want you to see my part of life… As your father said, ours was never meant to be together… You have to move on using all your power to forget what we had…

You would find a wonderful husband, boyfriend and a great lover who loves you more than I did… I’ve a life now with my dreams to be fulfilled. I have moved on… So I don’t want you to cram your life with my thoughts…Get over it…

Typing these he looked at the picture at his cell phone… He couldn’t help but tear down… he huffed for more breaths but his lungs rejected all that took his strength… His cell phone fell down and broke in pieces. He rolled to grab the glass of water but his hands started shivering. His body was trembling as he hold on to the sheets and gasped in pain. His heart stopped beating…. He was no longer in pain… 

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

P.S: This is my first try at fiction and my first entry at  Blogadda, Hope you all like it!

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